The HOLD path · two programs
A path for the part therapy didn't reach
From waiting daughter to held daughter
For capable women who understand their patterns, and still say: “My mom brings me to pieces. I don't know what to do about her.”
The Waiting Daughter · The Held Daughter
Free to join · Founding prices up to 35% off · No payment now
Licensed Mental Health Counselor (FL) · National Certified Counselor · 9 years working with daughters and their mothers · Trauma training with Dr. Bessel van der Kolk
Research with thousands of American families found most adult children never cut contact with their mother. They stay, and many still wait.
Reczek, Stacey & Thomeer, Journal of Marriage and Family, 2022
Some stop waiting. This is the path they take.
Is this you?
You are the one everyone relies on.
- And still, one call from your mother can undo your whole week.
- You say yes when you mean no, then feel exhausted and unseen.
- You've done the therapy and read the books. You understand your patterns, but knowing hasn't changed them.
- Part of you is still waiting for her to change.
Another holiday, another week lost after one call. It doesn't have to keep going this way.
You could spend the rest of your life actually enjoying it. Or you could keep waiting, and live next year the way you've lived this one.
That isn't because you haven't tried hard enough. Understanding is one layer, and most approaches stop there. The Waiting Daughter adds the layer that's usually missing: grieving a mother who is still here, then giving yourself the care you've been waiting for. One step at a time, and never alone.
This is where it starts to change.
Where this takes you
Held, instead of half-held
Steadier relationships. Saying no without guilt. Fewer crashes after conflict. And feeling held, starting with the way you hold yourself.
Now you're really in charge. You can stay close to her, say no calmly, and steer your own life.
Many women are waiting daughters, carrying porch-light grief for a mother who was there, but only half-held them. Change begins when we turn off the porch light, and start holding ourselves.
The Waiting Daughter · the HOLD path, part one
Your path from waiting to peace
Four steps, one for each letter of HOLD. In The Held Daughter, the same four letters become new, practical steps: Halt, Orient, Love, Declare.
H
Here
I'm here waiting. On the porch, the light still on.
See your patterns clearly, without blaming yourself.
O
Open the Door
I let myself feel it.
Make room for the grief, including grief for a mother who is still here.
L
Let the Light In
I let comfort in.
Begin giving yourself the care you didn't get.
D
Dawn
Done waiting.
Draw a line that holds, and find your own peace with her.
The Held Daughter · the HOLD path, part two
Your path from the storm to steady ground
The same four letters, now as practical steps for the moment a call, a visit or a text knocks you off your feet.
H
Halt
I stop. I notice.
Pause before you react, and notice what's happening in your body.
O
Orient
I'm here, and I'm safe now.
Come back to the present moment, and to the grown woman you are today.
L
Love
I give myself what I need.
Meet yourself with the care you've been waiting for, right in that moment.
D
Declare
I say what I need, calmly.
Say your boundary out loud, with the words ready, and let it hold.
I'm Natalie
I'm one of you. I was once a waiting daughter too.
I was the good daughter. A very good student, never any trouble. Later I realised that also meant I was very compliant and easy to manipulate. People called me “too sensitive.” What they didn't see was my strength. Growing up with a mother like mine, or like yours, you build a kind of strength other people don't have.
I grew up in Moravia, in the Czech Republic, and moved to Prague to study, alone, with very little money and no one to lean on. I was fed, but not held. And it showed, again and again, in difficult relationships.
That's when I started studying psychology. I wanted to understand what was happening in my life, and then I wanted to help other women too. I learned skills that helped me manage myself better, and I'm not waiting anymore. Now I help other women do the same.
That's why I speak your language, not textbook language. For nine years I sat with women who had read every book and still came undone after one call from their mom. We understood each other without having to explain. So I made the HOLD path, so you don't have to figure this out alone.
I'm a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Florida and a National Certified Counselor, with a graduate degree in mental health and marriage and family counseling. I completed clinical hypnotherapy training at the Institute of Interpersonal Hypnotherapy in Florida, and trauma training with Dr. Bessel van der Kolk.
Now I bring this work to women everywhere as a coach. It isn't clinical, and it isn't therapy. It's in everyday words, for everyday life.
It won't change your mother. What it can change is what happens in you when she calls.
Start with The Waiting Daughter, or choose The Held Daughter below. And if you'd like me beside you along the way, you can add three one-on-one sessions to either one.
Choose your program
Two programs, one HOLD path
Both follow the HOLD path, with four steps each, but the material is different. The Waiting Daughter helps you see what's happening and find your way toward peace. The Held Daughter is practical: exercises you use in real moments with your mom. Both are yours to take at your own pace, and you can add three one-on-one sessions with me to either one.
The shorter course · on your own
The Waiting Daughter
A journey from longing to peace
Recognize the pattern and give it a name. Then move toward peace: finding your place with her, setting boundaries that hold, and giving yourself the care you've been waiting for.
The longer program · on your own · coming soon
The Held Daughter
A journey from waiting to be held to holding myself
The practical side. Hands-on exercises for the moments that are hardest, and simple ways to calm your body before, during and after time with her.
Side by side
Compare the two programs
| The Waiting Daughter | The Held Daughter | |
|---|---|---|
| Lessons | 4 hours | 6 hours |
| Prompts and journaling | 2 hours | 3 hours |
| Scripts | ✓ | ✓ |
| Guided Practices for Calm | ✓ | ✓ |
| Optional add-on: 3 one-on-one sessions | $287 | $287 |
| Founding price | $97 | $147 |
| Full price | $147 | $227 |
Optional add-on · for either program
Want me beside you?
Add three one-on-one sessions with me for $287, about $95 a session. We'll look at where you are, build your roadmap, and set your direction, following the topics of your program. Use them within 12 weeks.
Licensed Mental Health Counselor (FL) · National Certified Counselor · 9 years working with daughters and their mothers · Trauma training with Dr. Bessel van der Kolk
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No payment now. A coaching program, not therapy or medical care.
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Coming soon
The Porch-Light Grief deck
A grief deck for waiting daughters: one card a day, to carry the four steps with you. Join the waitlist to hear first when it's ready.